Betrayed
by Trisha Whitlock
Summary: When you find out that the person you love betrayed you, it's like having your heart ripped out. I know because that's how I felt when it happened to me. I can only hope this pain isn't forever.  -some language


**A/N: This idea came to me after reading entirely too many stories where Edward cheats, says sorry, and Bella forgives him. I don't like that. I like strong and independent Bellas in my stories, which my friends and Betas can attest to. **

**Starts off B/E, and ends with B/?**

**Hope you enjoy. Read and REVIEW to your heart's content.**

Betrayed

It's not all that hard to love someone else. I believe the real challenge comes in loving yourself. And when I say love, I don't just mean affection. Love, for me, includes numerous emotions.

Respect is one of the most important. If you don't have respect for yourself, how can you truly love yourself?

There's also honor, trust, compassion. Those are just some of the more essential ones.

When I first met Edward, we were both in line at a Starbucks, as cliché as that is. He was there for his coffee and me for my occasional hot chocolate. We were both waiting for our drinks and just randomly struck up a conversation. As they say, the rest is history.

His looks were especially nice but it was his personality that helped me originally like him. He was so funny and adventurous. It was refreshing to be in the company of someone who knew what they wanted out of life.

His ultimate goal was to own his own construction company and at the age of 25, he was extremely successful.

I, on the other hand, wanted to teach. It was my passion. For some, they are happy with whatever they end up doing and that's fine. But for me, I know that I was meant to teach children the things that they would use later on in their lives. There are few joys more satisfying to me than seeing a child stumble over a word in the book then finally get it. Their smiles when they learn something new are addicting to me.

But back to love. A wise person once said that to love someone, you must first love yourself. Truer words have never been spoken. I learned this on a depressing Monday.

Why a Monday? I don't know. It just worked out that way. I guess that when there is bad news, there is no right time to find out.

XXX

It was lunch time and I had just gotten off of work early because of a teacher work day at the school. But since I always stay on top of my paperwork and grading, I didn't need to stay in the classroom that long after the children went home.

Since I got out around 12:30, I went and picked up some take out to take to Edward for lunch. He was known to frequently forget to eat due to his heavy work schedule, so I saw it as part of my girlfriend duties to take him something to eat.

You may be asking why we aren't married or at least engaged, but me and Edward just weren't there yet. It was not all that important at this time, but I was expecting for us to talk about it in a few months.

I made my way into the large building and towards the elevator. Edward had his own floor dedicated to his life dream and I couldn't be prouder of him.

I got out on his level, the 8th floor, and made my way to the desk of his assistant. But she wasn't sitting behind it. I was most surprised because she was normally always there.

"She must be out to lunch," I told myself with a shrug. Boy how wrong I was.

Making my way to Edward's door, I raised my hand to knock but stopped as I listened in on what I thought was him on the phone.

"We can't do this anymore Irina," Edward practically hissed.

"Why not?" I heard his secretary say.

And even though I shouldn't have been ease-dropping, I couldn't stop my curiosity.

"Well Bella is the first thing to come to mind. Last night was a mistake," Edward violently whispered. And while I am by no means stupid, I was praying that what I was hearing was just a figment of my imagination and I would wake up from this nightmare soon.

"Look, I like Bella. She's a nice person, but it's not like you were thinking about her last night when you were with me at my apartment. Or the time you bent me over your desk-" Irina tried to continue but was cut off by Edward.

"Stop it. I get it. But I love Bella and I can't do this again. She doesn't deserve this," he said.

As they continued to talk, I almost felt as though I was having an outer body experience. Everything was muddled and hazy. From my hearing to my sight. The tears that were collecting were slowly slipping down my face and there was nothing I could do about it.

Hearing these things made me think about those times he said he had to work late. Or those nights where he said he couldn't come over because he had paperwork or a client to meet. I felt so deceived. Was that when he was cheating on me? How long has this been going on?

I slowly tuned back into the conversation taking place in his office. I wanted to make sure that I missed nothing. I wanted to hear if any of my questions were answered.

"Edward please," she begged. "We are so good together. There is no way that you and Bella have the passion that you and I do."

I was getting sicker the longer they talked about me as if I was just an afterthought.

"No Irina. I love Bella and this ends now. It will never take place again. I will go home to the woman I love and act as though this never happened," he said with finality.

"So that's it? We're just over. No. I refuse to accept this. Bella will find out and when she does, I'll be waiting for you. Why can't you see how much I care about you? How much we work together?" she pleaded.

That was the final straw, hearing her beg for my man, but I guess he hasn't been just my man in a while. I was turning to walk away when I heard it, the sickening smacking of two people heatedly kissing.

I rushed to the elevators and got on the first one to arrive. I stormed out of the building in a tornado of emotions. Anger was the first and most powerful sensation that I was feeling. And after anger, I was feeling deeply hurt by the man whom I thought was to never hurt me in this way.

Heading in the direction of my car, I threw the takeout into a trash bin with such ferocity that a few people in the street looked at me strangely. I was not caring what anyone thought of me at that moment. I felt as though my heart was disintegrating into ash and no one could help me. Like I couldn't catch my breath no matter how much air was available.

I drove toward my apartment, happy that we had yet to move in together. On the way there, warring thoughts were floating in my mind.

Was something wrong with me? Is that why he cheated? Was it the sex or was I just not good enough? How could he do this to me? If I hadn't have found out, would he have told me? We he have kept sleeping with her?

With that last thought, the numbness of pain began to set in. I wanted to cry some more but felt as though I was in too much agony.

XXX

Walking into my apartment, I threw my purse and keys down on the floor somewhere and headed to the kitchen to grab the bottle of tequila I kept in the liquor cabinet.

I sat on my couch and slowly sipped from a bottomless cup of iced tequila. It started to numb me further to the point where I could calmly think about all that had occurred.

I wasn't sure how I missed his cheating, multiple times if I was to believe their conversation. And let's be honest, why wouldn't I believe all that had been said at this point. They didn't know I was there, obviously, so they had no reason to lie to each other.

XXX

A few hours after the lunch from hell, I heard a key in the lock of my front door. I knew it was _him_ because he normally always came over after work. Unless of course he was off banging his secretary somewhere, I bitterly thought to myself.

I continued to sip on my drink as I watched him walk in as though it was any old day. But then again, this is probably what he normally did after fucking that whore.

Oh, I'm sorry. Do I sound a little bitter? Well I am.

He sat down and looked at me with a curious look as though I was the weird one here. I was prepared to see him for I had made my decision some time ago about what I planned to do but I was not ready to look at his face and not want to claw his eyes out.

I do think that the tequila is making me a little violent…but that could also be contributed to my boyfriend cheating on me.

He was silent, which was surprising because he was normally so talkative, but I guess my face said more than I wanted it to.

Before he could say a word, I put down my cup, leaned back a little and calmly told him to, "Get out."

"What?" he asked with full-blown confusion. "Why do you want me to leave? And why are you drinking on a school night? Is something wrong?" He almost sounded as if he cared. But I knew better now.

"Yes, something is wrong. And don't worry about school. I've already called and told them I'll be out for a few days."

"Why would you do that? Bella, I'm really stumped here. What's going on?"

"Do you want to know? Ok. I'll tell you. But first I have a question."

"Sure, ask away."

"Do you really think that you wouldn't get caught?" I asked. Once again, I was very calm. But my calmness was actually scaring me. It was unnatural how resolved I was.

I clearly saw him freeze just a tad. He was unsure what I knew and I wondered if he would immediately admit his betrayal or if he would deny it.

"Wh-What are you talking about?" he asked with a little shake in his voice. I guess he was going with denial.

"I heard you with Irina today. I came to bring you a surprising lunch but it was me who left enlightened."

I saw him stammering to say something but I kept talking.

"I'm done Edward. I want you to get your things out of here and leave."

"No Bella. Let me explain."

"There is nothing to explain. You were sleeping with her."

"But I love you. I made a mistake but I'm so sorry," he begged as he attempted to get up and come over to me.

"No," I said holding up my hand towards him. "That's enough."

"But-" he tried again but I cut him off.

"No! You can't have loved me. If you did, there would be no way that you could have an affair," I said and as I saw his face of surprise I continued. "Yes. I was there long enough to here all about how last night wasn't the first time."

"You've lied to me, deceived me and broken me. There is no way I'll allow you any more power over me."

"Just let me explain. She was always there and…you were busy…work was…please Bella. I'm on my knees begging you to give me another chance. We can work through this. I want to marry you one day," he tried to explain.

I couldn't help the snort of laughter that bubbled out of my mouth at the last thing he said.

"Marriage?" I questioned after I had stopped laughing.

"Why would I ever marry you?" I asked in genuine wonder.

"Because we love each other. We can get through this Bella. Just give us a chance," he pleaded. The sad thing is that he honestly thought that we had some semblance of a chance of getting back together.

"Edward. I loved you. Hell, I'm still in love with you. But I know that I will get over it."

I saw his face fall and I really took no pleasure in his pain, but I did feel greatly triumphant in my internal strength.

"I don't deserve what you've done to me Edward. I'm a good person and was a great partner and if you honestly wanted to sleep with her, you should have done it after you broke up with me," I huffed out at him. I was pissed off but also had tears running down my face. Then another thought came to me that I hadn't previous had.

"Now I have to go and get tested. Tested Edward! Do you know how embarrassingly painful that will be?" I demanded.

My anger was now the main emotion again.

"You have no idea the love I have for you, but every moment since I found out the truth, it's dwindled down. And I can only hope that sometime in the future, your infidelity hasn't turned me into a bitter and hateful woman."

He just stayed kneeling on the carpet of my living room and it was as if before my eyes, those rose-colored glasses I always wore when I looked at him were clearing up.

"You have taken the wind out of my sails Edward and I can only pray that it won't be permanent. Now, I'm going to take a bath and when I get out, I would prefer if you and your belongings were gone."

I started walking back towards my bathroom with my drink in hand when I heard him say, "I'm truly sorry Bella. About everything."

I stopped and said, "Good-bye Edward," before continuing on towards a well-deserved soak in my deep tub.

XXX

After close to an hour in the tub, where I thought about numerous things, I made my way into the living room. I noticed that his books and random pairs of shoes were gone. I also saw the key that I had given him on my coffee table holding down a piece of paper.

"I'm sorry," it said, but I was so over hearing that. I crumpled up the piece of paper, made sure my doors were locked and went to bed. He could keep his sorry. I had no need for it.

XXX

A year after my break-up from Edward and an all clear from my doctor on the STD check, I was back to living happily. There were moments in which I was reminded that I was one of those people that didn't have anyone to go home to but I took pride that I wasn't one of those women who stayed for fear of being alone.

On a particularly random Wednesday, I found myself in a staff-meeting. We were talking about the two new teachers that would be joining the school. When the doors opened the principle stepped in with two people I don't remember ever seeing. One of them, the guy, was tall with blond hair and amazing blue/gray eyes. He was gorgeous. So captivating, in fact, that I couldn't even spare the other person a glance.

I blushed and looked down when he caught me looking at him. After a few seconds, I looked back up just to see if the coast was clear. I saw, instead, him walking towards me and one of the empty seats that was right next to me.

"Hi," he said as he sat down next to me.

"Hi," I replied as I turned slightly in my seat so I could see him better.

"I'm Jasper," he said as he held out his hand indicating that he wanted a hand shake.

"I'm Bella. What subject are you going to be teaching?" I asked after we shook hands.

"History. I'm addicted to teaching 3rd and 4th graders about the things that led to them being where they are. What about you?" he asked.

"I'm one of the first grade teachers," I said with pride.

"That's awesome," he smiled and I could feel that he really meant it.

I found myself smiling back. This is one of the first times that I've looked at a guy and wondered if he was the one.

As we continued to talk and later went out, I couldn't get over how lucky I was. Seems I had to kiss a few hideous toads to get to my prince.

And a while later, when we really started getting serious, I had a thought...Edward who?

**A/N: I hope that was enjoyed by some. If I get enough reviewers wanting a sequel, I may write one but I would appreciate reviews even if you hated it. Just try to tell me exactly why.**

**So please review…I am not above begging!**

**Let me know how you liked the concept.**

**Thanks, Trisha Whitlock.**

**p.s. looking at my name, it shouldn't have been that big of a surprise to see who she ended up with in the end. **


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